Slow News Day

Besides Mom getting a powder to drink to up her sodium (which she hated, by the way), a CAT scan, and an MRI, it was mostly just waiting around for some answers.

Here’s what Mom wrote in the journal.

I feel like my life is about to be nothing. Like I’m not going to be able to do anything.

I will not be depressed.

I just need help to know where I belong.

I will not be depressed. Even in the midst of all of this chaos, she wasn’t going to get depressed. That, my friend, is my mother. That’s the woman who raised me, by herself, with no help from anyone (except for my grandma, my dad’s mom). She had the heart of a lion bull.

I hope Sarah sees me as a strong person because I see myself as weak.

I always saw her as strong. Even to the end. She took her medicine because the doctors said she was getting better. Even through her confusion and sleepless nights, she came through just for a moment to do what she knew she had to, to get better.

She was strong. And always will be.

The strength you see in me, is because of her. I carry her strength.

I carry her.

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